Shalom beloveds.
Tanya is such a breath of fresh air. I met her years ago, when I was still at university. We worked together for the same company and one day she randomly approached me with a beautiful invitation to the Hillsong Colour Conference. I was mesmerised by this Christian women conference, and I ended up going. We kept in touch over the years and she always planted little seeds of Jesus, here and there, through every encounter we had. She is bold and beautiful within her season of singleness, I always admired her independency. So I asked her to share some more about her journey. Let’s dig in…
Would you please tell the readers a bit about yourself?
I am Tanya Sampson, a 35 year old woman living and loving in beautiful Cape Town, where I was born and have spent most of my life. I am the Managing Director of the Hillsong Africa Foundation and I love the work we get to do through our social development programs across South Africa. I am passionate about the Church and humanity being reconciled to their Creator. I love travelling and experiencing new cultures. I also am passionate about friendship and believe everyone should have at least one good friend and then be a good friend to someone.
Can you please tell the readers about your journey of singleness: what led you
to becoming single and/or what made you choose to be single?
I walked into a church service in 2008, at the age of 19, and got radically changed. Before that day, I was living a life of partying and dating different guys every other month. I was dating a guy for a few months before walking into that church service and after my life got radically changed by Jesus, I realised that I cannot be with this guy anymore as he was a part of my old life and I was now a new creation in Jesus. I made a commitment to God at that time, that I want to give Him at least 2 years of my life where I took my focus completely off guys and dating. During my teen years, I did the dating thing completely opposite to what God would have wanted and I wanted to now honour God in that area of my life by pursuing healing and wholeness in that area. I laugh now as I feel like God took that 2 year commitment very seriously as I am still single today haha. I have had interest from guys over the years and have gone on dates but nothing that led to a relationship thus far.
Give the readers 5-10 things you like and dislike about being single?
Likes:
● My independence – that I can still determine exactly what I want to do with my time, my money, where I live, etc. without having to consider another individual in that way.
● I like that I still have the time to really invest in my work without having to juggle a husband and family, guilt free.
● I also like that I have more time to invest in friendships and experience the joy of doing life with others in an expansive way.
● I love that I have more time to figure myself out, to unlearn things, to heal and get whole in certain areas so that I may be the healthiest version of myself for when my single season changes.
● I love that I can pursue God and the call He has for my life wholeheartedly, without distractions.
Dislikes:
● I’ve always wanted to be a mom and to have a family and I was hoping that by now, I will have had that.
● I dislike that we live in a world where being married and having children has a deadline.
● Sometimes the questions people ask and the comments they make around me being single can be hurtful and somewhat frustrating (I know people have good intentions but sometimes it’s annoying).
● How hard it is for men and women to be in healthy relationships in our modern world (something feels broken).
● This is a funny one but I am tired of driving myself around haha.
Can you give us advice on how to thrive within this gift of the single season?
As the things I have mentioned above, that I like about being single, seem to all revolve around TIME, that’s the best advice I can give: use this time of being single to do all the things you won’t be able to easily just do when you’re married. When you’re married, other things will be required of your time, still beautiful things but different from your single season. Invest in friendships so that you have good friends even when you’re married. Work on yourself, ask God to reveal things in your life that might cause issues when you’re married, so that you can acknowledge and work on them beforehand. A brave question I asked God a couple years back was: “Lord, have You promised me marriage?” I didn’t want to assume that God had this in my future and I wanted to ensure that I am aligned with His will and not my will. Also, figure out who you are as
a person and who God created you to be. I often use the example of the single season (with a desire to get married) as the time before an exam – we all love some extra time to prepare before writing that exam!
Can you please share a prayer for those who are in the season of singleness?
Father God, thank You that You are a good God. Thank You that You are trustworthy and we can entrust our lives and futures to You. Lord, reveal Yourself to us in a deeper way during our single season and help us to solidify our love for You and our dependence on You. Holy Spirit, lead us to find our joy and contentment in You. Help us to live lives that are worthy of who You called us to be and keep us pure. For those of us who desire marriage and a family, may we continue to put our faith and hope in that all things are possible with You. May our prayer always be that You are our greatest treasure and reward. May we remain faithful to what You have called us to, believing You reward the faithful. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Please feel free to share anything else the Lord has impressed on your heart
or a special message regarding this topic for our readers:
It’s okay to desire marriage! I sometimes felt shame for having that desire in the past few years because we are often told that we need to be content in our single season. Well, two things can be right at the same time – we can be content in our single season AND have a desire to be married. God is big enough to handle both those prayers! Also, ask God to reveal to you if there are things in your heart and life that are holding you back in this area – if there is, get busy with Holy Spirit to start sorting it out. Most importantly, you are loved by the Creator of the Universe and He loved you so much that He sent His Son to die on a cross and rise again so that you can know Him personally – your value lies in that.
Thank you for reading, till next time…
Peace and blessings in Yeshua!
